One of my long-time coachees, let's call him Mike, recently faced a common leadership dilemma: Can you be humble and honest while also being confident and enthusiastic during high-stakes situations like job interviews, board meetings, and presentations? Mike was prepping for several of these events and felt torn between two pieces of advice:
Be confident, don't undersell yourself, and never admit to failure.
Be yourself, stay modest, and embrace humility.
At first, these approaches seemed contradictory. But are they really? As Mike and I explored this further, a thought-provoking discussion emerged, which encouraged us to reframe our mindset around performance.
The Zoo vs. The Jungle: Understanding Performance Contexts
Imagine animals in a zoo. During showtimes, they're at their best—active, engaged, and seemingly flawless. Behind the scenes, in their "natural habitat," they might be grumpy, tired, or stressed. Their performance in front of the crowd is just one facet of their existence.
The same goes for us as leaders. There are times when we need to be in "performance mode"—interviews, presentations, board meetings. In these moments, we put our best foot forward, use positive language, and project confidence. Instead of saying "I don't know" with a shrug, we might say, "That's an interesting point. I'll explore that further and get back to you."
This approach isn't about being fake. It allows us to showcase the parts of ourselves that are most appropriate for the context. We're not changing who we are -- we're highlighting what fits best in the moment, we are very much our authentic selves.
The Olympic Mindset: Authenticity in High-Performance Settings
Think of Olympic athletes. Similar to the animals performing a show in the zoo, when they step into the arena, they're in "performance mode." They've trained for years, and during competition, they're focused and determined. Their authenticity remains intact; they're simply operating at their peak in a high-stakes environment.
As leaders, we can adopt this mindset. In important meetings or presentations, we channel our "Olympic selves"—the version of us that's most prepared, articulate, and confident. Rising to the occasion can be seen as bringing our best selves.
Adrenalin Rush and The Price of Humility in Performance
When you’re in performance mode, your adrenaline is high, your brain is firing on all cylinders, and your body is primed for action. This heightened state enables you to deliver your best—confident, articulate, and focused. Neuroscience shows that this state of heightened alertness enhances cognitive function, allowing you to think quickly and respond effectively. However, this doesn't mean abandoning humility altogether.
Humility fosters trust, encourages open communication, and promotes continuous improvement. Admitting shortcomings and being modest can build stronger relationships and a more collaborative environment. Humility isn't the opposite of confidence and as such has an important place in performance mode. It is excessive humility, to the level of self-bashing, that can be misinterpreted as a lack of confidence or competence.
Strike a balance. Be honest about what you know and don't know, but do so confidently. For example, instead of saying, "I don't know that, that's not something I am good at" say, "That's an interesting point. I'll explore it further and get back to you." This approach maintains your humility while projecting confidence and readiness to engage with the challenge, a.k.a. growth mindset.
The Necessity of Recovery
While being in performance mode can lead to peak performance, it’s also exhausting. Just like Olympic athletes who need recovery periods to maintain their physical and mental health, we too need downtime to recover from high-stakes situations. Recovery allows your brain to process experiences, reduce stress, and prepare for the next performance.
In recovery mode, you slow down, reflect, and recharge. This period is your natural habitat, where you can be completely unfiltered and relaxed. It’s crucial for maintaining your well-being and ensuring that when you do enter performance mode again, you can do so at your best.
Balancing performance mode with recovery time is, therefore, essential for sustained
success. In performance mode, be confident, honest, and humble in a way that doesn’t undermine your abilities. Afterward, allow yourself the necessary recovery to reflect, recharge, and maintain your authenticity.
Conclusion
Being in "performance mode" doesn't mean becoming someone you're not. It means being the best version of yourself when the situation demands it. As Shakespeare wisely said, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players." In leadership, as in life, we play many roles. The art lies in playing each role authentically, with integrity and purpose.
So the next time you're in a high-stakes situation, take a deep breath and channel your "Olympic self." Bring your best to the table, speak confidently about your capabilities, and showcase the best of who you truly are.
--------------------------
Hi! I'm Merve. 👋 I help corporate leaders and business owners build high trust, high performance teams, grow their business impact, and advance their careers.
Here are five ways you can connect with me:
1️⃣ Book a 1:1 Coaching Session: Tailored to your individual goals, I offer in-depth guidance, a focused strategy, and results-oriented accountability to help you navigate your professional and personal challenges for meaningful progress.
2️⃣ Join Signature Leadership Programs: Designed for corporate leaders and business owners at all stages of the leadership journey, these programs blend 1:1 coaching with group workshops and training, equipping you to grow your career, earnings, and business success.
3️⃣ Subscribe to My FREE Monthly Newsletter: Stay updated with the latest in leadership and business with insights and musings delivered directly to your inbox.
4️⃣ Access FREE Worksheets for Leaders: Visit The Worksheets Page to access and download worksheets and workbooks that provide practical exercises for enhancing self-awareness, self-reflection, and fostering positive change in your leadership and team dynamics.
5️⃣ Follow me on LinkedIn: Connect with me on LinkedIn for daily insights, thought-provoking articles, and a community of like-minded professionals committed to continuous growth and leadership excellence. Join the conversation and stay inspired on your leadership journey.