In a recent pool adventure, I watched my daughter and her friends navigating their colorful world with a level of leadership that was both fascinating and enlightening. This experience got me thinking deeply about the age-old debate of nature versus nurture in leadership.
Are we born a leader or do we become a leader?
The Scene
It was a sunny afternoon, and the pool was bustling with activity. My daughter took the lead in organizing a game involving throwing sinkers into the pool and diving in to retrieve them. What seemed like a simple game at first had layers of rules and complexities. You could only throw the sinker at a specific time with precise accuracy to land within a certain radius. They took turns throwing it in, then counted down before jumping in to retrieve it. The first to get the sinker and swim back out of the pool won—unless they were caught, in which case a different set of rules applied.
As my daughter explained the rules with input from her friends, more kids gathered around to join, and she and her friends happily welcomed them. My daughter showed remarkable initiative, quickly establishing rules and roles for her friends, and adjusting and incorporating others' feedback -- mostly in the form of objections. OK, I am biased (she is my daughter after all!, but it was fascinating to watch how naturally she stepped into this leadership role.
Nature: The Innate Leadership Traits
As I watched her, I couldn’t help but wonder if her leadership qualities were inherent. Certain traits seemed to come naturally to her:
Confidence: She exhibited a confidence that drew her friends to listen and follow.
Decisiveness: Her ability to make quick decisions and set the direction was evident.
Empathy: She showed an understanding of her friends' needs and feelings, ensuring everyone was included.
These traits align with many of the core qualities we often associate with natural-born leaders. So, it's tempting to think, "OK, she's 6.5, she didn't have much time to learn or observe or hone these traits, surely, she must just have it in her." That’s exactly what other parents around the pool were saying to me, watching the dynamics play out with amazement and giggles. "Wow, she’s a born leader," they told me.
Nurture: The Role of Environment and Learning
On the other hand, her behavior also reflected the environment she’s been nurtured in:
Role Modeling: At home, we emphasize the importance of teamwork and leadership. She sees us making decisions, resolving conflicts, and leading by example. The same goes for her teachers at school.
Encouragement: We strive to give her opportunities to lead in small ways, whether it’s deciding on family activities, helping in the kitchen, or watching her little brother.
Learning from Peers: By observing and interacting with her friends, especially those who are older, she learns and adapts her leadership style.
These nurturing aspects play a crucial role in shaping her ability to lead. Then, we might argue leadership is not an inborn trait but a skill that can be cultivated and refined over time.
Nature vs. Nurture: A Balanced Perspective
The interplay between nature and nurture in developing leadership skills is complex. Observing my daughter and her friends, it's clear that both elements are at play. Natural traits provide a foundation, but the environment and experiences significantly shape how these traits are expressed and developed.
Now, let's explore insights from well-researched thinkers and writers to gain further perspective:
Insights from Malcolm Gladwell
Malcolm Gladwell’s insights in "Outliers" support this balanced view. According to Gladwell, success isn’t just about hard work, ambition, and ability. It’s also about the context and opportunities that surround you.
Here are a few key points he highlights in his book:
10,000 Hour Rule: Gladwell famously argues that it takes about 10,000 hours of practice to achieve mastery in a field. This highlights the importance of nurture and practice in developing skills.
Birthdate Advantage: He notes that many successful people, like Canadian hockey players, were born in the first few months of the year, giving them a physical and developmental edge. (My daughter was born in September)
Environmental Factors: Successful individuals often have access to unique opportunities that allow them to develop their innate talents further.
StrengthsFinder Approach: Talent + Practice = Strength
Don Clifton's renowned StrengthsFinder approach aligns seamlessly with the blend of nature and nurture. It emphasizes that while talent provides the raw potential, it is through practice and application that these talents are transformed into strengths.
According to this model:
Talent: These are your naturally recurring patterns of thought, feeling, or behavior. They are your innate qualities that come naturally to you.
Practice: This involves honing your talents through focused practice and effort.
Strength: When you consistently apply your talent and practice over time, you develop a strength—a skill you can perform consistently and near perfectly.
So What?
Sometimes my coachees explore in our sessions how they can further develop their leadership traits. They might say things like,
"That's just not me,"
"I'm not a very good speaker,"
"I don't think on the spot,"
or
"I don't put myself forward, I'm shy."
What can be done if you are not born a leader?
Firstly, forget about the judgment that you are either born a leader or you are not. It's not true. Everyone is "born" with certain natural talents influenced by their environmental context. If you figure out what these talents are and practice, practice, practice, they'll become strengths.
Secondly, where you feel you lack the skill, say executive communication, look for opportunities to practice and improve. Join groups, take courses, or find a coach who can provide guidance and feedback.
Thirdly, you don't need a shiny status or title, or some authority given by someone else to demonstrate leadership skills. Everyone in an organization or group can be a leader. Leadership is about influence, initiative, and taking responsibility, regardless of your official position. Don't ask for permission.
Conclusion
Leadership is a dynamic blend of nature and nurture. Observing my daughter and her friends at the pool, it’s true that natural traits can provide a foundation, but it’s the environment and experiences that shape and refine these traits. Insights from thinkers like Malcolm Gladwell and Don Clifton further support this view, highlighting the importance of context, practice, and creating supportive environments.
Whether you’re a 'natural-born leader' (if there is such a thing!) or someone developing their leadership skills, remember that growth is always possible. Embrace your unique talents, seek opportunities for practice, and take initiative wherever you are. Leadership is not confined to titles or positions; it’s about making an impact and guiding others, no matter your role.
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